That’s how a friend described my text. Two of my best girls seem to always be on this journey with me. Sometimes we take our own roads, diet paths so to speak, but they always seem to parallel me; except when I run around in the woods chasing squirrels, hugging trees and wondering what the hell happened to that trail I was on. Then, we diverge for awhile until I find my way back. Somehow we, all three of us separately, decided to do the Body For Life plan all at the same time. It’s the ONE Continue reading “A Taco Happened”
I started Body For Life today. I just want cookies. That is all.
Okay, no, it’s not all. I went to the gym yesterday to test the knee on the weights. I need to lift a LOT of weight on this program. I want to load that sled up with 45s and go. So, I got on the sled, and hubby said, “try it with no weight first.” I gave him a look. “Just to test it.” Really? Do I look like a wee delicate flower? Fine. I lifted, and as I came down to 90° and started back in the other direction with “NO WEIGHT” it hurt. I decided that it just needed to warm up. I did a few more, “It hurts, doesn’t it?” Dammit. Yes, yes Continue reading “How Can This Possibly Work?”
So, happy hour was all well and good. I met a good friend at our favorite Mexican restaurant. We had a few cocktails, a few appetizers and enjoyed engaging and often deep conversations. Everything was right with the world as I drove home… up until the point where I was blinded by the glowing neon sign that declared “hot now” at the Krispy Kreme. Oh don’t act like it’s not a temptation. On a regular day I wouldn’t even look at the sign. I pointedly ignore it. Today however, let’s just say my eyes wandered. I passed by and immediately did a U-turn whipped into the parking lot and walked in for my hot now doughnut. I proceeded to order a dozen of assorted flavors that my family enjoys fully anticipating that everyone would be happy for a treat! Who was I kidding? How many do you think I actually made it home? The truth is, happy hour has now gone bad, really, really, bad. Not only did I eat a thousand million bajillion calories of sugar, I have injured myself with the evil gluten therein. I am gluten intolerant. Gluten makes my hands break out and itch and peel and bleed. It really sucks. However, in recent years it also makes my stomach hurt. So three hours post Krispy Kreme doughnut binge, my stomach is swollen like a pregnant person. I feel nauseated, and I have a headache. I am a complete and utter dumb dumb.
A miserable dumb dumb!! Sigh. When will I learn? When????
What was I thinking? Really! I’m wondering. I’m typing with panic in my veins.
There are only 340 days until I am standing with my hubs, my mountain bike and and a few hundred total bad ass mountain bikers in beautiful British Columbia waiting to hear the start gun. I swear to you right now that I’m on the verge of losing my breakfast. There will be 7 days of single track averaging 50 km a day. Wait, that means about 31 miles of single track mountain biking A DAY! There will be 7 days of ass numbing mountain bike seat sitting, slogging, sleeping in tents and using a porta-pot, or worse. I’m predicting there will be crying. There will be cussing. Oh my gawdddd. What was I thinking? What made me say yes? I don’t rightly know. The race sold out in 4.5 days, so I am not alone. Someone else out there must be freaking out. I’m sure of it. If you’re in and scared to death, please reach out and let me know. Please!
My husband is the cutest and most adorable man ever. I want to please him. I want to impress him. I want him to know he has the most amazing, and completely bad ass wife in the whole entire universe. Does it matter that I’m completely out of shape? Does it matter that I had knee surgery in August and am still trying to recover? Really, does it even remotely matter that I’ve not been on my bike in over a year? Does it matter that I’ve still got a huge ass (I could stop that sentence right there, butt I won’t…) monkey to rid myself of? No, no it does not matter in the least.
I’ve got just over 300 days to get in the best shape of my life. Is this what I needed? Will this be the catalyst? Will it?
This race is epic category stuff here. I know we haven’t done an “epic” thing in years… well, besides getting married 8 years ago (that was flipping EPIC), and the 10 day Alaskan kayaking trip 10 years ago was pretty danged amazing. Life’s been in the way of epicness. (Yes, I realize life itself is pretty damned epic, just go with it). Well, here it comes. It’s a bucket list item, definitely for him, and maybe for me. I’ve got a long way to go, so I better get busy.
Here’s my plan of attack: Tomorrow I go to the University of Texas department of Kineseology to get my DEXA Body Comp Fit scan. This is a very accurate way to measure body fat. I may or may not post it. I posted my last scan years ago. That was harsh. Maybe I’ll post the before and after in 12 weeks? Maybe.
I will start the Body For Life protocol tomorrow. I will do it for 12 weeks, knee permitting. This is the big factor for me. BFL requires heavy lifting. I have to be able to get my legs into this. I can definitely do the upper body workouts and I think I can do my cardio/interval training on the elliptical. This is a six day a week thing. I’ve done it before with spectacular results. It’s just super hard to commit to training six days a week. I’ve also got to figure out when to get some bike time in. And tennis, I can’t walk away from that. I would also like to use the sauna that’s in the garage. It’s just good for you.
They say that when you write your goals and intentions down, you are more likely to achieve them. Well, I’ve been doing that here for a few years now via this blog… uh. Never-mind. This starts now.
There will be 339 days during which I can prepare myself for this BC Bike race. I’m so scared right now.
Scared doesn’t quite do it. Terrified, really.
My knee is good enough for doubles and I get to visit my happy place. There’s nothing quite like the view from court eight! Because we have had so much rain in Texas and there is more predicted any minute now, I’ll be playing indoors today, but I don’t care. Just happy to be here. Privileged, actually.
I love the sights, sounds and smell of this place. The sound of a tennis ball is one of my favorite things. Indoors however, it has a completely different sound. A little muffled, a muted awesome thud.
There’s music in tennis, too. I have a blog post (in my head) to prove it.
Now let’s burn some calories girls! The fun is on!!
A friend politely pointed out this week, and last week too, so I’ll take the hint, that I haven’t actually written a post since April. Uh… what? I have no idea what the heck she’s talking about. I write at least 2 posts a day; I admit, I write them in my head. I have so many excuses. Wanna hear them? What is it with humans and excuses anyway? My monkey is still right here. In fact, he grew a bit in the interim. F’ing fleabag. I’ve got excuses for that too, wanna hear them?
I’m busy. I’m hungry. I’m tired. I’m carefree, or careless? I don’t give a flying *ck. I’m still tired. Did I mention hungry, no wait, hangry? I’m happy. Lots of squirrel activity, for sure. Not just in the yard either… my brain has been hyperactive. So, yeah, I know these are lame. Sad. But, all are true, and none are true. Nothing stays the same for long. I can use one of the above excuses for about two seconds and then BAM, I’ve got another one.
There are some cool new things. I’ve started (gulp) voice lessons for one. Yes, that’s gonna require a full post all to itself. Suffice it to say, I love to sing… to myself. Well, to my hubs, who admits he’s tone deaf and that music just goes in one ear and out the other. (SQUIRREL, once on a long car trip, I was asleep. I awoke to find that my hubs was listening to music in Spanish. I mentioned that I was impressed that he could enjoy Spanish music, he looked at me quizzically, tilted his head and in his wee Irish accent smiled and said, “Och, so it is.”) So singing to him is like singing to the air. I sang all the time to my babies. They’re not babies anymore and they tend to shush me now. They used to love it. Anyway, my dad is a great singer. He’s got a lovely voice, always has. Music has been a big part of my life, and well, someday I’ll write the post I’ve already written (like a thousand times in my head) about music and how much joy it brings me. How we used to sit on the big ranch porch with aunts and uncles, cousins and guitars and sing and sing. I know a bunch of awesome old folk songs, and old country. I’ve got a few new things in my bag too! You know… progress and all that.
And even though when I say the words out loud, “I’m a bit shy” people tend to burst into raucous laughter spontaneously, it’s definitely a true statement. Well, about singing anyway. So, there’s that. I’ve even gone and “performed” with other students at a local cafe. We had a band! (A wee check off the old bucket list). I almost died of fright and embarrassment, but that’s another post entirely. So now, I’ve got a keyboard (thank you Craigslist), an amp, microphone, mic stand, guitar and a knack for driving my kids nuts with it all. I love to run into the living room, grab the mic and tell them to “Get UP!!!” or sometimes I even sing things like, “Hey, Hey, Hey, please feed the dogs. They’re hungry little hogs…” or whatever happens to come out, with me, you just never know!
My oldest son is home from college and we’ve started guitar lessons. Yep. I’ve got funny little callouses on my finger tips. It feels weird to type. (Hey, put that up in my excuse paragraph… that’s a good one!) It’s not taking up that much time since I’m not a good practicer, but you know. I need to know how to chord so I can take my guitar on my women’s trip to Costa Rica in January for the evening bonfires and sing alongs. Oh, yeah!! My friend is leading Wellness Adventures to Costa Rica. You should totally check it out and consider one. I’ll be live blogging/posting/social media-ing the whole time. You’ll hear a lot about that one, so stay tuned.
To be fair, I have been writing a lot, but you know, real jobs. I’ve been writing lots of professional bios for a real estate company here. It’s been surprisingly fun and I’ve met some people that I just adore. They don’t realize they’ve got such great stories!
So, well, that’s just part of what’s going on. I’m back on the wagon with my eating. Sigh. 30 pound monkey’s gotta go. Ha! Maybe I should write a weight loss song. Oh hell, I’ve already done that in my head too. Okay, fine. My goal is to start blogging again. Here, and on Friday For Good… and AdVerb Creative. Do me a favor and check them out. If I’m not doing it. Ping me. Help me. I need to write. I’ve missed it. I’ve missed you too.
Spring is absolutely my favorite time of year. Here in Texas, we get about 2 weeks of spring and then we hit the 100s for a long, long time. Okay, maybe I exaggerate about the 100s right away, but Spring is really short and we’re in the 100s well into September. But, now is the time that my Facebook feeds are exploding with bluebonnet pictures. We Texans love, love love our wildflowers, especially the highly revered state flower, the lovely bluebonnet. Ladybird Johnson was instrumental in the beautification of cities and towns across the country. She introduced the highway beautification act and man, there’s nothing more Texan or more classic than taking your photos (kids, dogs, rattlesnakes) in the wildflowers along our highways! In Austin, we love our Ladybird Johnson so much that we’ve re-named Town Lake for her, and the Ladybird Johnson Wildflower Center also bears her name. I digress, my point is that spring has absolutely sprung. I love sitting outside in the mornings and watching the morning come alive.
But wait, there’s more! I’ve officially been sprung from my un-active (for almost an entire year!!!) prison! My knee has been tested and please forgive me for shouting and jumping up and down as I type this, “I PLAYED AN OFFICIAL USTA TENNIS MATCH THIS WEEK!!!!!!” Sorry, I know. It’s been nearly a year, just a couple weeks shy of a year since I last played a real match. I’m over the moon. I’m skipping through the bluebonnets! Did I care that I had never met my partner? Did I care that we got pounded? No, not one bit!! I’m just so happy to be out there. I knocked some of the rust off, and I’m (I need to sit down for this one) going to play singles (my first love) next week in the line up. So, just in case the dubs didn’t test it properly, this surely will. C’mon knee!! Fingers crossing everywhere, please!!
AND, if that wasn’t enough good news for one day, I’ve also been hitting the bike. Hubs and I did 20 miles over the weekend. His mountain bike is outta commission so he had his roadie, but I rode my mountain bike, and dang, it’s been a long time. It was paved with just a few hills and NO traffic. There’s this new bike path going from Austin to Manor and beyond. Thank you Austin! Tonight we rode a group ride that was a “beginner” level ride. Hubs always goes and helps the organizers, but this was my first time. Holy shittakes! Why was this 15 miles so much harder than the 20 over the weekend? That and well, my bohunkus hurts. I’m a tender-assed, bad ass. Yes. I’m going with that. So here’s some of the fun! Have a great week and ENJOY being active!!
Yes, I’m still enjoying bacon. I wonder if I’ll be sick of it in a few days? I had a delicious bunless burger with cheese, bacon, onions and a wee bit of BBQ sauce, and a few vodka sodas with friends. So, in three days, I’m down 3 pounds! Don’t start taking my glory by shouting “it’s water weight” because I DON’T CARE! I’m eating things I haven’t had in ages and I’m losing weight. Bring on the ranch dressing. Hell, I’m gonna dip my bacon in ranch dressing with a side of butter. All right, I joke. Sorta.